After working different weddings and receptions at a country club, I didn’t even need to read the context to this shit. However, we’ll give this bride a shot, let’s see if she’s able to make a goddamn case for having a wedding ceremony at 5:30 AM (though, this story comes from the
“Am I The Asshole?” Subreddit, so we’re already off to a bad start).
Every year on our anniversary, my fiance and I wake up early to go to the beach and watch the sunrise together. It’s a very special tradition, as we have both overcome a number of personal challenges during our time together, and the symbolism of watching a new day begin is deeply meaningful for us.
We decided we wanted to incorporate this into our wedding. Our plan is to have our ceremony on the beach the and have everyone walk over to a beachfront restaurant for breakfast, bloody Marys and mimosas (we’ve already talked to the restaurant owner about this, who loves the idea and said he’d be happy to open early for us).
After that, everyone is free for the remainder of the day. Our friends and family are mostly local and should all be able to travel to the beach in under an hour, except for some extended family flying in from Canada, but that’s unavoidable.
Based on our geographic location and the date of the wedding next summer, we’ve scheduled the ceremony start time for 5:30 a.m., when there should be plenty of light but the sun itself won’t be quite visible yet.
We’ve been getting a LOT of backlash from our families about this, who say this is way too early and we need to move the ceremony to a more “normal” time of day. But my fiance and I don’t feel like we’re asking for anything that unreasonable. AITA?
The responses to this started out fairly level headed, like this one:
A good solution is to have a private ceremony with you and your fiancé at 5:30, and then have a second ceremony at a more reasonable time for the guests. The first one can be just the two of you reciting your vows to each other, or the two of you with a willing officiant and a handful of close friends/relatives who are willing to join. If having two ceremonies is too costly and unreasonable, then just do the first option with the two of you only, speaking private vows.
But from there, it turned into a deluge of… Well, what do you think?
I mean do what you want, but if I was a guest I would think YTA 100%
Are you going to throw a fit if one of your bridesmaids is late, or family isn’t on time and you miss the sunrise / ceremony? Shit happens and I can almost guarantee something stupid is going to happen and someone or something will be late.
I mean honestly if you want to have 5 people and do this then I would kinda understand, but a large group of people? Yes you are an asshole.
Either cut the guest list, have it at a normal hour, or just do photos before the actual ceremony (during sunrise) and have the ceremony at 10am
That’s an insane expectation to have for people. Even if they make it there people will most likely be half asleep and not able to enjoy your wedding with you.
Travel time is “under an hour” plus they have to eat breakfast, and get dressed so they’ll be waking up at like 4:30 the latest.
Having a bunch of tired, grumpy, wedding guests driving to the same location at 5 AM sounds like a recipe for disaster to me.
Maybe have the actual ceremony at that time with just you and your husband and then have a reception party later in the day.
There is no chance I would be willing to get up at 2-3 in the morning to get ready for a wedding that early. I don’t neccesarily think you are the asshole, but I would be prepared for a lot of no shows.
Last, but not least, if probably my favorite point raised here:
INFO: what’s your plan if it’s cloudy on your wedding day and the sunrise isn’t visible?
Well, I’ll let y’all ponder this story, but I think most of us are going to end up on the same page here.
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