Heartbreaking final message of young nutritionist, 27, who hanged herself after being ‘tired of feeling tired’

A YOUNG nutritionist hanged herself after posting a heartbreaking note online – in which she asked her late dad to “make some room up on that cloud”.

Tara Condell, 27, was found dead in her upmarket Greenwich Village apartment in Manhattan, New York City on Wednesday afternoon.


Tara Condell, 27, took her own life on Wednesday after writing to her late father that she was ‘coming home’[/caption]


Tara as a child with her father. She said the had been considering taking her own life for years[/caption]

Concerned colleagues had raised the alarm after she failed to show up for work.

And they were shocked to find the apparent suicide note on her personal website.

The devastating letter was titled: “I Hate The Word “Bye”, But See You Later Maybe?”.

In it, she told how she would miss her favourite food and she begged her mum for forgiveness.


In another heart-wrenching section, Tara tells how she had contemplated ending her life since she was a teenager.

She added: “I have accepted hope is nothing more than delayed disappointment, and I am just plain old-fashioned tired of feeling tired.”

Tara signed off by writing: “I’m coming home, Dad. Make some room up on that cloud and turn the Motown up.

“I’m really sorry mama. Always, TLC”.


Investigating officers are said to have found a second note in Tara’s apartment – but have not disclosed its contents, according to the New York Post.

Tara received her bachelor’s degree in dietetics from San Francisco State University.

She went on to earn her master’s of science in clinical nutrition from New York University, according to an online bio.

It listed her “favourite things in life” as “food, helping people, and science.”

Condell’s Instagram page is filled with photos of her dining around the world at locations including Vietnam, Peru, Italy, Mexico and Germany.

Her employer, Top Balance Nutrition, put out a statement on Facebook Thursday afternoon confirming her tragic death.

It reads: “Tara was a talented dietitian loved by all of her patients and coworkers.

“But beyond that, she was a true friend who always extended her kindness to those around her.

“At this time, Tara’s family and coworkers request some privacy to process the tragic news.”

Last goodbye: Tara's heartbreaking final letter in full

I HAVE written this note several times in my head for over a decade, and this one finally feels right.

No edits, no overthinking. I have accepted hope is nothing more than delayed disappointment, and I am just plain old-fashioned tired of feeling tired.

I realize I am undeserving of thinking this way because I truly have a great life on paper.

I’m fortunate to eat meals most only imagine. I often travel freely without restriction.

I live alone in the second greatest American city (San Francisco, you’ll always have my heart).

However, all these facets seem trivial to me. It’s the ultimate first world problem, I get it.

I often felt detached while in a room full of my favorite people; I also felt absolutely nothing during what should have been the happiest and darkest times in my life.

No single conversation or situation has led me to make this decision, so at what point do you metaphorically pull the trigger?

I’m going to miss doing NYT crosswords (I was getting really good). That one charcuterie board with taleggio AND ‘nduja. Anything Sichuan ma la, but that goes without saying.

A perfect plate of carbonara (no cream!). Real true authentic street tacos. Cal-Italian cuisine. Hunan Bistro’s fried rice. The pork belly and grape mini from State Bird Provisions circa 2013. Popeye’s of course. Bambas too.

I’m also going to miss unexpected hugs. Al Green’s Simply Beautiful. Cherries in July. Tracing a sleeping eyebrow. Smoking cigarettes.

The Golden Gate Bridge at sunset. That first sip of iced cold brew in sticky August.

Making eye contact with people walking down the street. When songs feel like they’re speaking to your soul.

Jeopardy. Saying I love you. Late night junk food binges. Shooting the shit. And especially the no-destination-in-sight long walks.

No GoFundMes, no funeral, no tributes, no doing-too-much please. All I ask now is for you to have one delicious (I mean a really really great) meal in my honor and let me go, no exceptions.

It’s selfishly time for me to be happy and I know you can get down with that.

Please try to remember me as a whole human you shared memories with and not just my final act.

This is not your fault. It’s not exactly easy for me either, I’m here for you. I love you. I always have and I always will, I promise. Shikata ga’nai [‘it cannot be helped’ in Japanese].

I’m coming home, Dad. Make some room up on that cloud and turn the Motown up.

I’m really sorry mama.

Always, TLC


Tara, whose social media accounts showed her enjoying spectacular food all around the world, said she would miss her favourite meals[/caption]


The successful nutritionist asked for her mum’s forgiveness in a tragic final letter[/caption]


Tara, from San Francisco, worked as a successful nutritionist in New York City[/caption]


Tara asked her late father to ‘make some room up on that cloud’ for her[/caption]


Tara as a child with her father[/caption]

If you are affected by any of the issues raised in this article, please call the Samaritans for free on 116123


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