I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned this or not, but I had a family member that was in HR for a casino. The stories he told me won’t be repeated here, mostly because my first name is on this post, and anonymity is kind of important when repeating someone else’s HR business.
But a few of that family member’s stories could hold a candle to some of these horror stories. A few of these run long, but… They’re goddamn unbelievable, and had to be preserved in their full “glory.”
I had one employee submit a form to increase her own salary, she also forged her manager’s signature.
Like, for real?
My friend was doing hiring for a staffing agency during college. A guy who we went to high school came in looking for a job. He told the candidate that he had two jobs. One paid 10 an hour and the other paid 11. The only thing was that the 11 an hour job requires a drug test. And if you fail the drug test you can’t get either.
He said that he wanted the 11 an hour job.Now we knew him well enough to know that he liked smoking. So my friend reiterated the drug test fail rule. Dude said he was good on Friday to take the test Monday.
Come Monday he took the drug test. Pissed hot for weed, cocaine, amphetamines, and some other shit that gets out of your system in ~48hrs.
There was a dude in our other facility that was going around and wiping their ass and shoving the shit back up into the toilet paper dispenser so that when the next person goes to reach …
Came in to work early for a morning shift (work in an industrial lab). Heard noises from the back corner of the office portion of the building but can’t make out what they are because of distortion. Head that way to see what was going on as I was the only one there (so I thought) at 3 am. See my lab manager fucking the district manager (her boss) while the HR Rep for the district is sitting there … enjoying the view. I NOPED and went to the lab and tried to forget what happened.
Saw a guy blatently lie in his recruitment form….(watching him fill it out in front of me!)…it was total bollocks….apparently he was 15th in line to the throne, went to Eaton, studied at Oxford and served in the Army for 9 years after training at Sandhurst….not bad for a 21 year old! Who had in fact spent 3 years in a Young Offenders institute, battling a drug problem……
Finally all my misery is worth it! Here are just a few from my many years working in HR in startups:
– We hired a very senior person (management team) and for his work visa i needed a copy of his university degree. Followed up repeatedly, he kept making excuses like “oh i just moved i need to find where i put it” or “i need to see if it’s in the basement at my parents’ place.” Turns out he had lied on his CV. He resigned immediately.
– CEO had threesomes with employees and ordered coke taxis to the office.
– Head of HR went on maternity leave so the CEO seized the opportunity to only look internally for the role and chose solely based on who he wanted to fuck.. which he then did.
– After a company party the toilets and sinks in the women’s bathroom were all backed up. Plumber found multiple condoms stuffed down the sink and flushed down the toilets. We found hand and footprints on the wall tiles and the security cams showed the last people leaving the office to be 3 straight men in relationships.
– At a company retreat an employee did too many mushrooms and shat himself on the beach in front of the entire company. At the same retreat 3 employees cheated on their partners and there was 1 divorce.
– When we found out the developers never washed their glasses, just rinsed them and put them back on the shelf.
My friend who worked in HR told me about her old job where the boss had drilled a hole from his office through to the ladies changing rooms and was perv whacking it every chance he could get. They found out because someone saw the light through the hole as he took the cover off for a peek.
He denied everything and they had to take a dna sample from the carpet under the hole which confirmed it was a) him and b) that he had indeed been whacking away.
We had a guy in one of our stores submit a grievance to us about how we were discriminating against him because we were giving a female 7 months pregnant colleague some extra breaks (she had a medical note confirming the reasonable adjustments needed) so she could sit down for an extra 5 mins every so often because he was unable to get pregnant so could not take advantage of the same extra breaks.
Didn’t really know where to start with that one!
My company used to give branded gifts to our clients. One employee volunteered to drive one about and hour away, and he took another employee with him. What he didn’t tell anyone is that he didn’t have a license, his car was unregistered, and his brakes were bad. So inevitably his brakes failed while trying to stop at an intersection, and he totaled his car. Thankfully no one was seriously hurt, but he got into trouble when the cops came.
My favorite was the dude who would have meetings with his boss via camera (he was remote) and while they discussed his (abysmal) performance, he would have naked women get up from his bed and walk around. He was told this was inappropriate several times. Continued.
We fired him for fraud, a separate issue that was like a Tarantino film but gives too much away here.
Manufacturing, long story short, the company uses some pretty dangerous equipment and machines. The manufacturing floor and warehouse had started to have some safety issues, so they decided to start doing random drug tests.
60% failed, including the best friend of the owner. This same person was responsible for several of the safety issues mentioned above and was directly responsible for two people being injured while on the job due to negligence on his part. So what did HR do?
Nothing. The owner was one of the people that failed.
one place i used to work, one of the upper management guys who was in charge of the warehouse would hop on the forklifts and do donuts. he had colon cancer and was always having surgeries to remove another section of colon so he had a colostomy bag.
he would like squeeze air out of his colostomy bag while he was doing donuts on the forklifts. it would waft this god awful stench everywhere. everyone thought it was hilarious and would immediately run outside for a smoke break until the scent dissipated. the smell was bad enough it made a coworker puke.
also had another manager there eat six 10 sacks of white castle sliders for lunch. he ate the last 10 sack on the toilet. i have no idea how he could eat with the sounds and stenches he was emitting from his other end. it sounded like someone trying to drown donald duck in a puddle while tooting a tuba. no one went into that bathroom for the rest of the day.
I am on the HR team that supports a wide variety of US cities for our company, including our colorful Florida locations. This is the best story I heard.
We had some woman trying to avoid doing work by sitting out in her car in the parking lot. While she was hiding out there, she needed to use the restroom. Well, instead of going back inside (or doing literally anything else) she decides to pee out her car window.
Even though I am also a woman, I was impressed and disgusted by the physics behind this feat. She had stuck her bare ass outside the window and just went for it. Unbeknownst to her, her male co-worker had arrived at work late due to an appointment. He drove past to find a parking spot as this was happening, and got full view. He then reported the incident to us.
One of our HR people had to investigate this, and sure enough, parking lot cameras could corroborate his story. Our HR person confronted the woman. Her response: “Well how did he know it was me?? It could have been anyone.” We thought, ok fair enough. The cameras aren’t CSI grade zoom, so we only saw the ass part.
It was harder to completely identify the face. So we went back to the male peer and asked how he knew it was her. His response? “Oh it was definitely her. The face tattoos are pretty recognizable.”
We definitely don’t get paid enough for this.
Why funny? Because individuals imagine in the truthfulness of funny data. People Read newspaper for up to date information which they will’t get as a result of busy life fashion and extra for the new product provide, new schemes provided by close by distributors. Most of the individuals choose information picture paper to get new product data and good shopping for alternative and likewise for information replace. Most of the Business group used this media to advertise their product or providers as a result of funny pic are cheap promoting medium which covers quite a lot of clients shortly and having good impression on the buyer relating to truthfulness which supplies them good returns. It’s additionally a great way to share the announcement which spreads shortly to need a part of society.
(Visited 6 times, 1 visits today)