Paulina Porizkova has opened up about her relationship with her late husband Ric Ocasek and the love he made her feel in a poignant tribute written nearly a month after his death.
The 54-year-old supermodel took to Instagram on Thursday to share a black and white photo of herself with The Cars frontman that was taken during a shoot with famed photographer Steven Meisel.
In the heartbreaking caption, she recounted how her estranged husband made her feel loved for most of her life, explaining that he was the ‘sun’ that she revolved around, even after their separation in 2017.
Emotional: Paulina Porizkova, 54, took to Instagram on Thursday to share a moving tribute to wrote for her estranged husband Ric Ocasek, who died on September 15 at the age of 75
Love: In the heartbreaking caption, she recounted how The Cars frontman (pictured with her in 2013) made her feel loved for most of her life and called him the ‘sun’ that she revolved around
‘Ric and I have been separated for nearly three years now. But we still lived together and still filled the family car,’ Paulina wrote. ‘Everyone who knew Ric knew that he could be aloof. And not particularly social. But when he decided to turn his focus on you, it was as if the sun came out.
‘His smile and his gaze warmed you and made you feel like the most special person in the world. I had that gaze and smile on me for most of my life.’
Paulina married Ric in August 1989, after meeting the singer on set while The Cars were filming the music video for Drive in 1984.
‘For a long long time, no one could make me feels [sic] as loved as Ric. He was my sun,’ she recalled. ‘With this, I don’t mean my sunshine, no, Ric could be pretty gloomy.
‘In fact, when we first met, he reveled in his nickname “the Master of Doom”. But in my universe, it was where he rose and where he set that was the point to which I oriented myself,’ she explained.
‘Like a plant, I tilted my head to catch his rays. Our separation didn’t alter this one bit. He was rising and setting and I planned my life around it as one does a day: depending on the position of the sun in the sky: you’ll have breakfast or go to work or dinner with your friends.
‘His death is the end of my world as I knew it.’
Story: Paulina met Ric (pictured in 1990) when The Cars were filming the music video for Drive in 1984, and they wed five years later. They were still married at the time of his death
Memories: ‘His smile and his gaze warmed you and made you feel like the most special person in the world,’ Paulina wrote of The Cars frontman
Paulina, who shares sons Oliver, 21 and Jonathan, 25, with the 75-year-old singer, found him dead in their Manhattan townhouse on September 15.
A New York City medical examiner determined last month that he died from hypertensive and atherosclerotic cardiovascular disease with pulmonary emphysema being a contributing factor.
Ric had undergone surgery two weeks before, but while speaking with Rolling Stone last week, Paulina stressed it was ‘not at all related’ to his death.
‘I don’t know how much I want to say about the surgery, but it was successful. He was recuperating really well,’ she said. ‘So his passing was a f*****g shock.’
The Sports Illustrated star told the publication that she brought Ric cookies the night before he died.
‘When I got there, he was sitting in his usual chair and I said, “I got some gooey cookies,” and he said, “OK, thanks, hon — I had some terrible cookies because I was in the mood for cookies, but I’ll have your gooey cookies tomorrow. I think I’m going to bed early since I‘m feeling a little sore,”‘ she recalled.
‘And that was the last time I saw him alive.’
Paulina said she thought he was asleep when she came back and checked on him the next morning.
Mourning: Paulina, who found Ric dead in their Manhattan townhouse, shared a family statement on Instagram on September 16
Touched: The supermodel shared images of the flowers and toy cars left by fans, writing, ‘Thank you,’ alongside the image
‘I did some chores and then it was 11, and I thought, “This is weird, there’s something not right about this,”‘ she said. ‘I poured the coffee and came upstairs to give it to him and he was in the exact same position; he hadn’t even moved a little bit. And at that point, I knew, but I couldn’t believe it.
‘I walked up to him and he still looked asleep. Except he was really, really still and his eyes were a little bit open. I thought he was waking up, actually. I was about to wave my hand in front of his face and go, “Hey, I brought you coffee.” But I touched his cheek and it was like touching marble. That was pretty f*****g awful.’
Paulina said she waited to call 911 because Ric’s manager had warned her that she and her family would be hounded by the press once the news broke.
The musician has six sons in total, two from each of his three marriages
‘I wanted Ric’s sons to get here so we could all say goodbye to him,’ she explained. ‘So we waited, and we got to circle the bed and hold hands and really say goodbye. We were here with his shape for many hours after his death.
It was kind of wonderful because we all understood he was gone. He definitely left us. But the minute I called 911, literally two minutes [after], there were paparazzi at our house,’ she noted. ‘That’s just disgusting.’
The day after Ric’s death, Paulina released a family statement on Instagram.
Long marriage: Paulina and Ric (pictured in 2018) were together for 28 years before she announced their separation last year
Candid post: Paulina shared this message on Instagram in regards to their split
‘Ric was at home recuperating very well after surgery. Our two sons, Jonathan and Oliver, and I were making sure he was comfortable, ordering food and watching TV together,’ she wrote.
‘I found him still sleeping when bringing him his Sunday morning coffee. I touched his cheek to rouse him. It was then I realized that during the night he had peacefully passed on.
‘We appreciate the great outpouring of love. We, his family and friends, are completely and utterly devastated by his untimely and unexpected death and would appreciate the privacy to mourn in private.’
She also posted an image of the flowers and toy cars that were left by Ric’s fan, writing: ‘Thank you.’
Paulina and Ric were together for 28 years before she announced their separation.
‘Our family always has been — and still is — a well-built car. When the four of us are together, we can go wherever the road takes us,’ she wrote on Instagram at the time.
‘But as a bicycle, my husband and I no longer pedal in unison. So we’re ditching the bike. The love we have for one another is so wide and deep it’s practically tangible, and that sort of love can never disappear.’
The pair put their $15 million townhouse on the market in January. It’s the same townhouse where he was found.