MAKING James Bond funny, modern and fit for the post-#MeToo world is Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s new mission . . . and she’s chosen to accept it.
The leading man himself specifically requested Phoebe, confident that she can improve the script that he felt needed “polishing”, by bringing her wit and offbeat style of writing.
Bond 25 has been hit by huge problems since it was announced four years ago.
Director Danny Boyle left the production last year, citing “creative differences”, and filming has been repeatedly held up. But what exactly can ferocious feminist Phoebe, bring to Bond?
Here, four Sun writers set out how they would like the iconic spy’s character to be shaken and stirred up for a 2019 audience.
Where are the billionaire female baddies?
By Karren Brady, entrepreneur and Sun columnist
IT’S about time James Bond had a shake-up. For years it’s been plodding along with the same old storyline.
If anyone can make it work, it’s feminist Phoebe Waller-Bridge. With her witty repartee and offbeat writing, she is the perfect candidate to give Bond a #MeToo makeover.
Daniel Craig is right, Bond is crying out for a change and desperately needs an injection of life. If truth be told, our much-loved spy is becoming a bit old hat and a tad out of date.
In an era of female empowerment there is growing noise for a female 007. Don’t you think “Bond, Jane Bond” has a ring to it?
But let’s take small steps first. If I had access to the script I would mix things up a bit. Bond’s adversary is always a billionaire male, but how about a billionaire female villain instead?
A strong, successful, bright woman — someone to match Bond in every way. Even better if she can resist his chiselled jawline and smouldering looks and rebuff his advances.
Or perhaps we could learn a bit more about Bond’s past. Wouldn’t it be great if it revealed he had a really strong mother, growing up?
There is definitely a way Bond can be modernised without him losing his masculinity or sex appeal.
Drafting Phoebe in to update the script is a genius idea. I’ll be first in line at the cinema, popcorn at the ready.
Why are all his women dull, dumb or mad?
By Bella Battle
PHOEBE WALLER-BRIDGE is the best thing to happen to Bond in decades. But not because James himself needs an overhaul.
Cynical, sexy and prone to taking the p**s, 007 is practically perfect just as he is. Nope, it’s the Bond women that need to change.
For too long they’ve been either hot bikini nothings, revenge-bent psychos or dull high achievers with improbable names. Dr Christmas Jones, anyone?
While Bond saves the world, they make do with a licence to boohoo, flirt and misunderstand vital instructions. They rarely get the best lines and they often end up dead. And that’s where Phoebe comes i
The Fleabag genius knows how to write funny, feisty women you actually like and care about.
It’s time Bond women made us laugh again. Recent bore-off heroines such as Madeleine Swann in Spectre and Camille Montes (whooooo?) in Quantum Of Solace need to go.
And instead let’s have more three-dimensional beauts like Vesper Lynd, who matched Bond for bantz as well as brains
After all, how much sexier is it watching James enjoy verbal foreplay with an equal rather than simply dry-humping a jazzy croupier with a name like Fellatia Goodlay?
The female villains need a revamp too — and again, Phoebe is the girl for the job.
Long before Killing Eve’s Villanelle, there was thigh-cracking badass Xenia Onatopp, PVC-clad Fatima Blush and the riotous Bambi and Thumper.
Octopussy even had her own babes-only floating island. God, those days were fun.
And Phoebe’s anarchic sense of humour should be just the ticket to give us back these brilliant, bonkers characters that gave Bond a run for his money. They are far more likely to leave James (and audiences) both shaken and stirred.
He needs more of a backstory… I want to pity him
By Tanya Gold
REMOVE the cars and the guns and the ties — how does a civil servant afford such great ties? — and James Bond is, at heart, a sex addict.
He should stay one. I can’t imagine a psychologically healthy professional assassin and I don’t want to.
His true loves died, you might say — Tracy Bond by a bullet from Irma Bunt, Vesper Lynd when a Venetian palace fell on her, Jill Masterson by paint.
It would never have worked out anyway. So he should stay a sex addict, as he is — do you remember him shagging whatshername against a mirror in Spectre, just after he killed her husband? That’s not normal.
He has all the tics of the addict — emotional isolation, raging fury. He really likes killing people, that’s why he’s good at it — a deadly charm, as compensation for the fact that he can’t feel.
What I want from the new Bond — who should be played by an ambivalent hottie, I don’t care which one — is more back story and emotional exposition.
Why is he like this? I loved the end of Skyfall, and the shootout in his parents’ Scottish mansion.
They died in a climbing accident. Is that why he was so keen to destroy their house?
He could have led the cyber villain Raoul Silva somewhere else. Anywhere else. The local Ibis, for instance.
I want a Bond I can pity, and I want to pity him while watching him take on the villains of the age as a penance for being such an awful person — Facebook, the remnants of Isis, Jacob Rees-Mogg and the European Research
Group. It could be the new Spectre.
And the car? That’s easy. An Aston Martin Superleggera. It’s the best car they have ever made.
And if he does ever make it with a woman, which he won’t, a Ferrari GTC4 Lusso. It’s got four seats, so there will be room in the back for the children he won’t ever have.
A powerful equal lover to toy with him
By Annabelle Knight, Sex and relationship expert
JAMES Bond has many positive traits, a lot of which are used as markers in life coaching to provide clients with a sort of road map to living well.
We also see him physically vulnerable at times, a bullet here or stab wound there. However for me the character is missing emotional vulnerability, and I would love to see this expressed in future films.
The James Bond franchise has a lot of female characters, but they’re nearly always designed to fulfil a certain type of role, and used more as plot points than as a tool to really develop and drive the story.
I would love to see James Bond meet his match and instead of presenting women as disposable characters have them play a more crucial and key role.
It would be hard to argue that James Bond sees the women in his life — excluding M — as little other than playthings.
During the course of the franchise 007 beds 52 women, a lot of whom end up dead, which only reinforces the narrative that in the world of James Bond, women are disposable.
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I for one would absolutely love to see the boot on the other foot (don’t worry, I’ll let him live!) and to see a powerful female character toy with him instead.
The introduction of a woman with equal value, and who holds an equal stake in the mission would be fantastic.
Perhaps in this version the female character is so phenomenal that instead of following the usual path of 007 “romance”, we could see him spellbound and impressed by her skill, charm and magnetism?
It would be so refreshing to introduce a strong female character, with intellect and talent to rival our hero’s, and instead of detracting from the universe many have come to know and love, it would only add to it.