You DEFINITELY weren’t supposed to see that…
There are some things in this world you just shouldn’t have to see. You know, like a suitcase full of dildos under your mom’s bed or a drive-by shooting. People are sharing the stuff they really shouldn’t have witnessed and it’s a nice mix of entertaining and awkward.
My mom gave me an old laptop of hers when I was about 13 and I was scrolling through random pics she had left on it of my little brothers football games and then boom, nudes of my mother.
Happened when I was 7. I found the Tom and Jerry DVD I had lost, in the back of a drawer. In celebration, I decided to watch it again. By the time my mother walked into the living room and saw me watching a threesome, I was already scarred for life. She took away the entire DVD collection.
Just 2 days ago, at a community pool, a teenage couple who entered into the pool area went into the hot tub. Stood up to stretch my legs and looked over to, well, sex in the hot tub. It was mid day!! I cringed pretty hard… but I laughed even harder when the neighborhood cop showed up.
My camp counselor’s penis.
Lock the bathroom door buddy.
I was downloading a game on my uncle’s computer. So i was looking for the files to complete the setup and I clicked on a file called games. Few videos popped up so the curious girl that I am I clicked on one and there was it, a Chinese girl literally fucking her couch.
That was my first porn experience, I was 7 and my sister was 5. And it doesn’t stop there, we decided to show our mom, I’ll never forget the trauma on her face.
Happened to a friend of mine. She was dating this dude forever, they broke up and he moved out, she was devastated. About a month later she was cleaning out old stuff and found a receipt for a ring that he had bought for her and never given her.
That’s how she found out that he had once intended to propose, before he fell out of love with her.
I found a suitcase full of dildos under my moms bed when I was 8.
Back in 1997, I started work at a new job and took over the office of a salesman who had recently been fired. I was in IT, using the same computer that had been setup for Sales. My first task was to install all the software I’d need.
The computer hard drive was almost full, so I poked around and found a TON of folders filled with porn. Went to my supervisor, and he said to delete it, warning me that the salesman had been fired for downloading porn.
Over the next few weeks, I kept finding secret porn folders on the the company’s network. Not only had he downloaded enough porn to max out his computer’s HD, he had the network at about 90% capacity.
When I was done deleting all the folders I could find, the server capacity was less than 50%. Dude was seriously addicted to porn.
Bad stuff: I saw a car get shot up one time.
Good stuff: Discovering poorly hidden Christmas and birthday presents.
A woman using a sink as a bidet.
Leaving work late one evening, I saw the HR director and CFO in a dark office shredding papers (no, that’s not an euphemism). I didn’t say anything but quietly walked on down the hall. Two weeks later we were raided by the SEC and several people were charged with cooking the books.
I found a letter between my parents back when my dad was in the army (10 years before I was born) when cleaning out the house. He was saying how they should get a divorce because it just wasn’t seeming to work out. When I was 16 they did end up getting a divorce, I’ve never talked to them about it.
My dad’s AA chips. Learned it’s why my parents got divorced. Proud of him for being in recovery though.
I was in elementary school playing basketball, I shot the ball but it ended up going over the fence on the other side was someone’s backyard. My teacher requested that after school I knock on the door of the house where the ball had landed to get it back and so I did.
I did not expect a woman wrapped in a towel with one of her nipples revealed to answer the door. I was shocked but carried on with my mission. For those wondering, she stated she did not have the ball.
My severance check. Apparently someone at the payroll company addressed it to me instead of HR. Opened it at my desk and laughed, packed up my shit and left.
When I was 11 i walked into my mum’s bedroom and saw my mum and her husband doing a 69.
We never spoke about it.
I once arrived early to pick up a girl for a first date. She was renting a small garden apartment behind a bigger house. It was just after dusk and I walked around the corner.
The sliding door was standing open and she was inside walking around, brushing her hair, wearing only her underwear. She did not see me, so I just walked back around that corner and waited another 10 minutes. When I walked round again she had a dress on. I never told her.
When I was about 16, I was snooping in my parent’s wardrobe. Found a diary written by my mother when she was 14 (from the year 1970). Read some beautiful and brilliantly written entries about meeting and dating my dad (who was 16 at the time).
In one such entry, all of a sudden she discloses that she’s had an abortion. Performed by my grandfather. An anesthesiologist. She never told anyone.
One time when I was around 9 years old, I woke up to take a leak in the middle of the night. I saw that the TV was still on in my parents room through the tiny opening in their bedroom door (my bathrooms near my parent’s room). I went to check up on them, and when I opened the door… My God I can never erase what I saw.
I saw my mom on the edge of the bed and my dad eating her out with all his might. I literally said, “Mama?” and they didn’t even hear me because they were so into it, so I just ran quickly back to my room.
I remember the next morning, during breakfast, I asked my mom if there’s anymore juice left and she said, “There’s no more. Your dad has the last cup of juice.” And then my dad said, “You can drink the rest of it if you want.” He offered his cup of juice to me and I looked at the rim of the cup and already felt sick to my stomach. I’m 20 now and I still can’t believe I remember seeing that.
Years ago a colleague had an old smartphone that he brought in to give to another coworker as theirs broke. The phone was sitting on the new owners desk but she hadn’t yet tried it out, as it was still charging after months of not being used.
I pressed a button and the first thing that I saw was a Google search for “lump on anus”. I quickly put the phone back down. This must have been the last thing he searched for when he last used it a long time ago, and forgot about it…
Back when I was a teenager, we hosted a New Zealander at our house for a couple weeks. Guy gets to our place after the flight, and about 10 minutes later I’m walking around my house to see where he’s at.
The door to his room is partially open, and the dude is laying face down on the bed and HUMPING THE EVERLOVING FUCK out of a pillow. I backed away slowly like Homer when he saw Apu cheating on his wife.
I felt bad for the pillow.
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